


Pretending for Christmas

by The Mighty Porthos (Porthos4ever)



Category: Mirrors (2008)
Genre: Alcohol, Anal Sex, Ben gets White-Girl-Wasted, Christmas Fluff, Demisexuality, Drunk Sex, Explicit Sexual Content, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Falling In Love, Hand Jobs, Holidays, Homophobic Language, M/M, Meet the Family, Oral Sex, Sharing a Bed, Sober Sex, Trans Male Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-31
Updated: 2020-12-31
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:28:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28461678
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Porthos4ever/pseuds/The%20Mighty%20Porthos
Summary: Ben doesn't want to spend Christmas without his best friend. But Larry needs to go home and protect his younger cousin from a homophobic uncle. What better way to do that then to draw fire with a pretend boyfriend?
Relationships: Larry Byrne/Ben Carson
Kudos: 1





	1. Chapter 1

It wouldn't be the first time Ben had thrown an orphan's Christmas in his apartment with Larry, but it was shaping up to be the smallest. Angie had gotten serious with her girlfriend and was driving out to Connecticut to spend the holidays with her family instead of coming out to see him, and he and Amy were on break... again. Even the year before, when they hadn't been, she'd gone back home, but they'd been newly back together and it had seemed too awkward to try and go with her, especially when the last thing he wanted was to leave his best friend alone for the holidays. There were always other friends, of course, a number of their classmates from Quantico didn't travel for the holidays but Ben knew that if left to his own devices Larry would probably end up with Chinese food and Die Hard, which really didn't count as a Christmas movie as far as getting in the Christmas spirit was concerned.

"You think we should do turkey, or ham this year?" he asked, one Saturday morning over coffee.

He expected his roomie, who still looked half asleep, to perk immediately - even if cooking was anything but Larry's forte, planning get-togethers certainly was - but instead his friend's lips pursed in displeasure, and he let out a long breath.

"I... think I gotta go home this year."

"Really?" Ben stared at him, confused. While Larry still stayed in contact with most of the people on his Dad's side of the family, his relationship with his father was anything but close. Ben couldn't imagine ever turning his back on his own child, especially for something like being gay, but Larry's father... sounded a bit of a piece of work. "Is something going on? Your Grandma okay?"

Larry nodded, leaning back in his chair. "Yeah, everybody's fine. But my cousin Alex is finally going by "he" full time now, and while my Aunt and Uncle are being super supportive and even Grandma thinks it's cute...."

"You're afraid your dad's gonna be an asshole?"

"Who knows. Maybe not an overt asshole, but he's not going to be pleasant about it," Larry replied, letting out another sigh. "Really wish he'd stayed with my grandma more after the divorce and not my grandpa. I gotta go run interference. I'm sorry, Ben, I'd way rather be here with you."

He looked miserable, and Ben felt it just as poignantly. What was the point of even doing Christmas if Larry wasn't going to be around? He felt even worse about the idea of Larry going home alone to draw his father's bigotry away from his cousin, as noble as his intentions were.

Then an idea struck him. "Hey... want me to go with you and help?"

"Yeah?" Larry looked surprised, and then smiled - his wide, slightly lopsided and entirely infectious grin that always made Ben secretly feel a little fluttery inside. "Like... as my fake boyfriend?"

It hadn't been what Ben had meant, but of course that's what would really be effective. And it was hard to want to say no, with Larry smiling at him like that. "Yeah. Think it'll be enough to keep your father from picking on sweet little trans boys?"

"I think he'll be _livid_ ," Larry replied gleefully.

And that was how Ben found himself making the drive to upstate New York with Larry, with three days of clothes in a duffel on the backseat of his car. He'd let Larry go through his closet and then take him shopping, which meant the sweaters and v-neck shirts clung to his body and accentuated his muscles, the sleeves on the v-necks short enough to give glimpses of his tattoos. It was all definitely not what Ben would have ever chosen to wear from himself, but part of him found it secretly thrilling to let Larry dress him, quietly hoping that his roommate, who always had impeccable taste, might consider him attractive in the new threads - or at least enough to pass as someone he'd believably date.

"You sure you're okay with this?" Larry asked again as they parked in the back alley, behind a large blue suburban. He looked a little worried as he turned in his seat. "We don't have to play at being boyfriends, just having you with me to support me is enough, Ben...."

Ben shook his head, smiling and trying to bank down the sudden surge of butterflies. "It's fine, Lar, it'll be fun. Besides, it's not as if we haven't kissed before."

"Drunken New Years kisses don't really count."

"You wanna practice now, then?" Was Ben pushing it too far? Was he taking advantage of the situation to get what he'd secretly wanted from Larry for ages? It had taken him a while to realize that the feelings he had for his friend went in this direction, sometime in their second year of being roomies, and it had been hard to keep himself from saying anything, especially during the times when him and Amy weren't together, when Larry had boyfriend trouble. But Larry had said time and time again that he didn't want to settle down, and things with Amy were so complicated, and could Ben even call himself bisexual if the only man he'd ever gotten butterflies for was Larry?

"Yeah?" Larry looked surprised, then gave a little smile that was adorably awkward, leaning closer to him over the center console of his car. "I mean, only if you want, we don't have to, like, be super into PDAs or anything...."

"I think that kind of defeats the purpose of bringing home a fake boyfriend to antagonize your dad, doesn't it?" Ben leaned into him, reaching up to cup his jaw. "If it's alright with you, of course. We don't have to."

"I - no, you're right." Was Larry actually nervous about them being convincing? Ben tried to smile reassuringly, then leaned in and kissed him.

It was... really nice. Kissing Larry had always been really nice, of course, even if Ben had had to previously use New Year's drunkenness as an excuse to kiss him for longer than he really should have. He let himself kiss Larry now like he very much wanted to, sucking at those lush lips and licking past them with a low, pleased hum. Larry echoed it, tasting him back, and for a long moment Ben let him revel in the intimacy, stroking his fingers through Larry's thick auburn hair before finally forcing himself to pull back. "Convincing?"

"Uh? Oh. Yeah. Yeah, I... I think so." Larry grinned again, still nervous, but pulled back before Ben could say anything more, getting out of the car. "I'm sure it'll be totally fine."

Ben stepped close to him as they reached the top of the back walk, wrapping an arm around his waist as Larry rang the bell. It was a little strange, when Larry was bigger and certainly taller than any woman he'd dated, but it made Larry grin, leaning into him a little as the door opened. "Grandma!"

"Little kit! Come in, come in out of the cold, ah I'm so happy to have you home again for Christmas!" 

Larry's lips must run in the family, Ben thought as the older woman who opened the door broke out into a grin, pulling him inside and into a kiss. "Nan, this is my boyfriend, Ben."

"And doubly happy to finally meet your Ben!"

 _Finally?_ Ben let himself be pulled into a hug, laughing as he received the same kiss on the cheek. "Thanks for having us, Mrs - " he stopped, realizing he didn't know her last name.

"O'Sullivan, dear, but you best be calling me Nan," Larry's Nan replied with mock stern-ness. "Come get settled. I hope you don't mind, dear, but I've put you two up in your dad's old room, it has the king for your long legs," she said, taking them through a kitchen with something bubbling in a big pot on the stove, then down the hall. "Callie and Kai are taking the basement with their little ones. Poppy and Bryan will be in her room and the girls - I mean, the kids - can fight over the bunk beds next door and the air mattress in the study."

"We can take the study," Larry protested.

"Nonsense! You can't bring your nice young man home and put him on an air mattress," Nan scolded. "Now settle in and get washed up, Callie's flight should be in by now, we'll eat when they get here."

"Is Christmas always so... huge?" Ben asked as she left.

"Kinda depends, I think." Larry set his own bag on the window sill. "Take the desk if you want. I haven't been home for a few years, if I visit in the summer it's easier to avoid my dad. I know Aunt Callie was too pregnant to fly last year, but Aunt Poppy lives close enough to drive in and Aunt Maisie's only half an hour away, she helps Nan with the house a lot. Dad...'ll come for a dinner or two.

Ben perched on the edge of the bed, looking around the room. There were a couple of baseball pennants hanging over the closet door and some books on shelves, but otherwise not much to show that a young boy had made it his home. "What's the deal with your dad, anyway? Your Nan certainly seems happy you brought a boyfriend home."

Larry shrugged, pulling out the desk chair and sitting down, resting one foot on the edge and hugging his knee. "Nan doesn't talk about the divorce much, but it must have been bad back then. She got custody of him and Poppy, but I guess Dad kept running off to stay with my grandpa, so after a while they just let it be most of the time. Then she got remarried and had Maisie and Callie. Don't know if he felt like the odd one out or if grandpa encouraged him. Sorry about the whole bed thing, by the way. I assumed we'd be in the study and could just blow up an extra air mattress."

"It's fine," Ben replied, shaking his head. "Lots of room. I'll try not to snore."

"You sure? I could probably fit the skinny air mattress against the window - "

"Lar. It's fine. Shouldn't we keep up appearances anyway? Unless you really don't want to...."

"I'm okay," Larry replied, smiling as he stood. "I'll show you the bathrooms, we should probably shower now. Once everybody else gets here shower time's at a premium."

~~~

What was most unexpected about being Larry's fake boyfriend for Christmas was how easy it ended up being. Ben had realized, as they sat down to dinner with his Nan and youngest Aunt and her family, that him and Larry hadn't talked at all about their story or how to answer questions. But it didn't really matter when they could just tell the truth about things - how they'd met, how long they'd known each other, stories about living together. Behavior was easy, too. He'd always felt comfortable with Larry, of course, but now Ben found himself interacting with him like he would have with Amy without hardly any thought - sitting close to him, resting a hand on his shoulder while he talked, and even, in the few semi-private moments when he'd catch Larry watching him, leaning in to steal a soft peck from his lips.

"Your family's pretty great," he mumbled sleepily when they finally went to bed, warm and slightly tipsy from homemade eggnog. Unthinking, he curled on his side and let a hand rest on Larry's bare chest, affectionate like they had been all night.

"....yeah," Larry said after a moment, and while Ben sleepily noticed the hesitation, he was dozing off before he could formulate a reply.

~~~

Ben awoke the next morning when Larry got out of bed, saying something about getting in shower time before the rest of the family arrived. It sounded like a smart idea, so Ben sleepily got his things together and did the same. Probably the only time he'd have in private, part of his brain pointed out, so Ben took a little longer in the shower than strictly necessary and took care of the morning wood. And if his thoughts wandered to how nice it had been to kiss Larry in the car and how nice it would be if someone randomly hung some mistletoe so he'd have an excuse to give him another really good, passionate kiss, well... Larry didn't need to know about any of it.

Larry's second aunt arrived with her husband and kids shortly after noon the next day, followed quickly by the third, and everyone was bundled into vehicles to go skating at the community rinks. The sisters were clearly thick as thieves, and Ben couldn't help but wonder if his father minimized contact with the family because he felt out of place, or if the second had caused the first. Then he pushed the thoughts away and enjoyed Larry's happy socialization, skating and laughing and taking the small styrofoam cups Aunt Maisie offered from big thermoses filled with mulled wine.

Larry's second cousin Alex, who was still in high school, was also deemed old enough for the wine. The kid was adorable, gangly in a way that indicated he might get close to Larry's height, chin scruffy with the delight of any young guy first growing facial hair. All the aunts cooed over how smart his new undercut was, and the uncles were warm and quietly approving, but it was clear that Alex gravitated to Larry, the oldest cousin and the oldest boy. It made Ben feel slightly guilty - should he have encouraged Larry to go home more often? Larry always took time in the summer to come back and visit and more easily avoid his father, but surely it wasn't the same as being home for Christmas.

Still, when Nan told them that Larry's father was regretfully indisposed for dinner, it seemed like everyone breathed a little easier. There was more wine with dinner, more questions and stories, and Ben let himself relax into it, happily talking about the amazing things Larry had done at school despite Larry's laughing complaints.

"You found a really good boy," Larry's aunt Maisie told him in a low voice as the night grew late, looking at Ben and giving a wink.

Did Larry's smile seem wistful? "Yeah. Yeah, I really did," he replied, and Ben wrapped an arm around his waist and pressed a kiss to his temple.

He'd had far too much wine, he knew he'd had too much wine, but the world was warm and giddy and happy, and when he finally stumbled back to their room with Larry, it was impossible not to reach for his friend, pulling him into a kiss like he'd wanted to all evening. "Wish there'd been mistletoe."

Larry stiffened in his arms, then gave in, letting Ben pull him close, lips parting to his kisses. "Ben, we're drunk..."

"Still wish there'd been mistletoe," Ben replied, then let himself lick into that luscious mouth, Larry's lips sweet and stained from the wine. He arched up into the warmth of his body, groaning at the feel of being close to him, tangling one hand in his thick auburn hair.

Larry's hands slid around his waist, whimpering into his mouth as he pressed Ben back against the wall. "We're drunk," he said again helplessly.

Ben arched up against him, already half-hard - surely Larry must be, too. "Never stopped us at New Years," he pointed out, and was rewarded with Larry's fingers digging into his back, hips stuttering against him as his kisses grew hungrier.

Then Larry pulled back suddenly, breathless, shaking his head. "We never did this at New Years. I need to go to bed. I need sleep."

Of course. Of course, they were only pretending, weren't they? Ben nodded, clumsily stripping down to his boxers and climbing under the covers. But Larry was still so close to him, and after spending what felt like the whole day wanting to be closer Ben couldn't stop himself. Larry was so close and much less clothed, and Ben stroked hungrily over his bare chest as he pressed half over him in bed, claiming those lush, gorgeous lips again.

Larry gave another helpless moan, arching into him without hesitation, lips parting to his kisses eagerly. And for a long, blissful moment all that existed was that - the pleasure of Larry's mouth, kissing him with all the longing that had been building during the day, arching close, closer still. Running his hands over Larry's bare body as their legs tangled together, arching into him, aroused and craving more.

"Ben..." Larry said helplessly, but his fingers dug into the small of his back, pulling him closer. Ben rolled his hips against him without hesitation, groaning at the press of Larry's cock, hard through the thin fabric of their boxers. Ben started to kiss along his jaw hungrily, sucking at his throat - so strange, to have stubble-rough skin under his lips, but it was so arousing to taste him, to feel the warmth of his body, Larry exhaling with a helpless whine as he arched up against the weight of his embrace.

"We shouldn't do this," Larry gasped again, helpless. "Ben - "

"I want this..." Ben raised his head to look at him. "Feels like every part of me aches to be close to you. Don't you want this?"

Larry gave a choked, helpless noise - was it a laugh, or a sob? Then he was pulling Ben close, kisses hard and trembling. "Of course I want this," he gasped, tugging at his boxers. "Fuck, I want this."

A corner of Ben's mind told him he should be questioning this - Larry's response, if this was even a good idea in the first place, but it felt too good. How long had he wondered about this, how many ways had he secretly imagining them becoming _more_? He tried to soothe Larry with kisses, shifting so he could work a hand between them, down into Larry's boxers. "I want this," he promised again, curling his fingers around the shaft of his cock and groaning at the rush of arousal. "God, you're so hard... god I want you."

Larry's hips stuttered up, pushing into his fingers, breath in hot gasps against his lips. He kissed him again, hungrier, fingers tangling in his hair, tugging Ben's boxers down so he could touch him in kind. "God you're horny when you're drunk," he breathed, words a little shaky. "God, Ben... don't stop...!"

The intoxication of the wine should have dulled his senses, but somehow everything seemed more intense, more arousing - the feel of Larry's cock in his grip hard, slick with precum as he stroked him, the soft gasps of pleasure he drew from his friend's lips as he stroked him. The knowledge that he'd brought Larry to such a state. And of course, his own pleasure burning bright, more exquisite than he could remember despite their awkward, fumbled efforts to please each other. It was too good, and Ben fought the pull of climax, not wanting it to end. Then Larry's fingers were digging into the back of his neck, hips stuttering up into his grasp, gasping pleasure against his lips as he spilled slick against his palm. And almost before Ben could react, Larry was sliding down, taking his cock in his mouth, and the world dissolved into pleasure.

The euphoria of climax ebbed into a bone-deep relaxation. Ben was vaguely aware of Larry tugging his boxers back into place, then cleaning the jizz off his fingers. Far too much movement, he thought, pulling Larry into his arms, pleased as his friend gave in, nestling his face into Ben's chest. Part of his mind registered Larry calling his name, and Ben managed to make a noise in response, but quickly fell deep asleep.

~~~

For a moment, when Ben awoke, all that registered as that he'd somehow cuddled close to Larry in the night. He'd cuddled _very_ close to Larry, spooning up against his back, and it was something his cock was very much into, nestled against Larry's firm, pert ass. For that moment Ben felt a spike of panic - how the hell had he ended up like this? - before his memories came back fuzzily. Him and Larry and too much mulled wine, and yearning kisses that had turned to far, far more.

They'd made love, Ben thought, with a warm rush of satisfaction, that turned to wondering happiness. Larry had let him. Larry wanted him, too.

Pleased, Ben couldn't help but cuddle closer, tightening his arm around Larry's waist and pressing a warm kiss to his bare shoulder. God, it felt good to hold him like this, and even better to touch him, stroking down his stomach, drinking in the warmth of his skin under his fingers. Larry shifted against him, clearly awake, and Ben could feel Larry's breath come faster as he pressed back into him. A low, pleased moan escaped Ben's throat as he started to lavish kisses on his skin. Was Larry hard, too? The urge to find out was too great, and he stroked down to cup and stroke him through his boxers, groaning at the surge of elation that came from wrapping his fingers around the hard shaft of his cock.

Larry gave a slightly strangled sounding whimper. "Ben... what are you doing?"

Ben let himself suck on the ridge of muscle between Larry's neck and shoulder. "Mmm... waking my boyfriend up on Christmas morning?" He let himself press closer, cock nestling between his ass cheeks. "Mmm... can I get you off again?"

"Jesus..." Larry rocked back against him, breath catching in his throat, one hand moving down to cover Ben's where he stroked him. 

It was certainly more than enough encouragement, and Ben pushed his fingers under the waistband to take him in hand, grinding against his ass as he started to stroke him. Could he come just like this? It felt a bit like being in high school, but just remembering what it had felt like to have Larry come in his fingers made Ben feel mindlessly aroused. "Feels so good, Lar," he breathed, running his thumb over the head of his cock and stroking the slick of his arousal over his skin. "Really wanna get you off like this...."

Larry gave another, distinctly helpless whimper, hips stuttering up into his fingers. Then suddenly he was pulling Ben's hand away, pulling out of his embrace, out of Ben. "I can't. Ben, I can't, we - I have to see my Dad today, I have to deal with him, and I - you're not actually my boyfriend."

His words felt like someone had thrown a bucket of ice water over him. Ben sat up, confused and more than a little hurt. "But - last night - "

"We were drunk," Larry said firmly, sitting back down on the side of the bed and covering a hand with his own. "Let's not complicate this, Ben."

Of course. Of course, this playing at boyfriends was just putting on a show, how stupid was he to think otherwise? He knew Larry didn't even want a relationship, and he was sure he was going to work things out with Amy again, though at the moment he wanted nothing less in the world. Then a terrible thought struck him. "Oh god. I took advantage of you last night."

Larry looked surprised, then huffed out a soundless laugh, shaking his head. "No. No, nothing like that. Don't think that." He leaned in to press a kiss to his forehead, then let his face rest against his hair with a sigh. "We were both drunk. Let's just forget about it."

 _But I don't want to,_ Ben thought miserably, but bit his tongue. Larry clearly did. And the last thing he should be doing to Larry was putting more on his shoulders when the whole reason he'd come with him was to support him. "Okay," he managed to whisper.

"Okay," Larry echoed softly. He kissed his forehead again, then pulled back. "Gonna go grab the shower real quick. I'll call when I'm done so we can swap out."

Ben nodded, watching him leave the room. Then, not knowing what else to do with himself, he slid a hand into his boxers and tried unsuccessfully not to think about what it had felt like to have Larry's lips wrapped around his cock.


	2. Chapter 2

It was hard to feel Christmassy when what had happened between him and Larry still weighed heavily on Ben's mind, but for a while Ben was able to hide it in a cup of coffee with breakfast, then steal outside for a cigarette. He took some time to call Angie and wish her a happy Christmas, and hearing his sister's happiness did make him feel somewhat better.

Then the cousins all sat down to open presents, and it was easy enough to sit quietly by Larry, munching on the random assortment of homemade snacks and chocolates that kept getting passed around. He and Larry had already exchanged gifts before they'd come - Ben had (rather ingeniously, he thought) bought Larry a new pair of shoes from his favorite brand that Larry had gushed over when he'd opened, and Larry, who Ben had learned early in their friendship had far better fashion sense than he, had given him a deep blue cashmere scarf, and a very nice sweater with a strange collar that looked amazing on him and fit him like a glove. Ben had put it on that morning, and tried to remember to smile and flirt and _play boyfriend_ when Larry had complimented him on it.

Larry and Alex had disappeared upstairs at one point when the other cousins were occupied to exchange gifts in private, coming back all smiles and giggles. "Presents not parent-appropriate?" Ben leaned in to ask quietly when Larry sat down, and Larry grinned.

"Ordered him a packer. Aunt Poppy knows, just not exactly something you wanna pick out with your mom."

Even though Larry had gone in on drawing names with his aunts, Ben was surprised to find that his Nan had knitted them both lovely matching grey-blue knit caps, each wrapped up with a pack of new dress socks. "Thank you," Ben told her, feeling touched. "You really didn't have to...."

"Nonsense, family needs to keep warm," she replied, coming over to adjust the hat around Ben's ears and examining it critically. "Good fit, very smart. Larry said the blue would bring out your eyes, and he was right. Just make sure Larry throws out his threadbare socks when he gets home, it's a disgrace."

"They're not that bad, Nan!" Larry complained, despite hiding the hole in the toe of one sock under his other foot. "And no fair using my boyfriend against me!"

Ben forced himself to laugh, trying not to think about the fact that he _wasn't_. More and more, the weekend was reinforcing the realization he'd been denying for far too long - that he _wanted_ to be, wanted this to be more than just play, but it was also reinforcing what Ben had known for ages, which was that Larry didn't want that. Was it fair of him to take such a gift when he wasn't actually family? But the last thing Larry needed right now was to worry about him, so Ben banked it down, and smiled.

And then, of course, Larry's father showed up.

The gathering of opening presents had dissolved into several separate groups; they'd been setting up to play Risk with Alex and his younger sister Caity and uncle Kai, while the younger kids played with various christmas gifts and the aunts were laughing in the kitchen over another slow cooker of mulled wine while finishing the prepping for dinner. 

Nan met Larry's dad at the door, pressing a kiss to his cheek. "Frederick, dear, so glad you could make it."

Larry's father cast his gaze around the room a little awkwardly before returning the kiss, pressing a giant tin of Danish butter cookies and a wrapped parcel into her hands. "Thanks, mum. Brought some things for the kids..." he took a pink gift bag from the larger bag under his arm that still had the price tag hanging from it, handing it to Alex with a nod. "Didn't realize you were coming up this year, Larry, so...."

Larry stood to meet him with the kind of awkward, back-thumping hug Ben saw from far too many macho straight dudes. Larry had clearly inherited his height from his father, but not much else, Ben thought - Frederick's hair was dark, graying at the temples and thin all over, and he had an unpleasantly weak jaw, though Larry's eyes were perhaps closer to his than his mother's. "Last minute plans," Larry replied smoothly. "Nan really wanted to meet Ben, so we decided to come up. This is Ben, by the way. My boyfriend."

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Byrne." Ben offered what he hoped was a friendly smile, though Frederick's gaze stayed on him for possibly less than a second, only giving a perfunctory nod. Then he handed Larry a plastic bag that turned out to hold the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit calendar for the upcoming year. "Well, Merry Christmas."

Larry's eyebrows knit together as he looked down at the calendar. "Dad, I appreciate the thought but you know I'm not into this."

"You mixed us up again, Uncle Frederick," Alex declared, plucking the calendar from Larry's fingers with a grin and pushing the holiday issue of Vogue into his fingers in return, then leaning up to press a kiss to his uncle's cheek. "This is fantastic, thank you!"

Frederick frowned. "Ally, your dad doesn't want you looking at that smut."

"Alex," Larry corrected.

"My dad and I watched the Victoria's Secret fashion show together last week," Alex replied with a bright grin, before heading upstairs with the calendar.

"Let's go for a cigarette," Larry said to Ben, and Ben had never been happier to agree.

"This happen often?" Ben asked when they were finally outside, and Larry gave a distinctly uncomfortable laugh.

"I mean, I spent most of my Christmases in Ireland with mum, but that great Earring Magic Ken I have was a trade with Alex for a bunch of Ninja Turtle action figures he gave me when I was fifteen. I want to give him credit for trying, but it's just so obviously, like... heteronormative wishful thinking. I mean really, the Swimsuit edition?" Larry frowned around his cigarette as he took a drag. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have made you come. He's such a dick. Didn't even say hi to you."

"It's fine," Ben said, squeezing his shoulder. "I'm here for you. And Alex. And your family's really sweet."

"The rest of them," Larry agreed.

Alex popped out of the door behind them onto the back porch in an oversized hoodie, leaning into Larry with a grin. "Can I have a drag?"

"No! Smoking's gross and bad for you and you're much too young!"

"I'm almost eighteen!" Alex replied with a frown. "Besides, you just gave me porn."

"It's not technically porn," Larry replied. "And you stole it from me. Thanks, by the way."

Alex shrugged. "Hey, you only came because I asked. How long do you think it'll be before we can get him to leave? Are you two gonna be super gross and like, make out?" He seemed gleeful at the thought, and Ben tried to push away the wave of uncertain longing he felt.

"Making out in public is gross even if you're straight," Larry shot back. "And we're not _trying_ to make him leave, just trying to make him not be a dick!"

"But I wanna see his faaaace," Alex grumbled, stuffing his hands into the hoodie pockets and scuffing the snow off the side of the step with one booked foot. Then he looked up at Larry with a grin. "You could tell him you bought me my first dick for Christmas."

Was that what a packer was? Ben eyed the teen. "You really want talk about sex toys in front of your whole family?"

"Not a sex toy," Larry corrected quickly, going a little pink. "Just a packer."

"Way better than stuffing socks down there," Alex agreed, patting his crotch with undeniable pride, which finally gave Ben an idea of what they were actually talking about. "And I can even pee through it! Think I could write my name in the snow?"

"You can certainly try," Larry replied with a laugh. "Just not in front of my dad. And we're not making out."

"Booooo." Alex pouted, and went back inside.

"You guys seem close," Ben remarked, and Larry smiled, leaning back against the wall of the house.

"I've tried to keep in touch, growing up. He was always a bit queer. I felt like I needed to support him, but I think it also made me feel a bit more comfortable about coming home, knowing I wasn't the only one. Things have always been so weird with my dad that I'm not sure I would have otherwise."

It was so hard for Ben to imagine, when it had just been him and Angie and their dad for so long growing up - his dad's parents had both died when he was young, and mom's lived so far away, and after she'd died they hadn't gone out to visit much. Then Dad had died, and it had just been him and Angie. It was hard to imagine _wanting_ to turn his back on family for any reason when Ben felt like he would have given anything to have his Dad back, but seeing how tense Larry was just being around his Dad made it easier to understand.

"I know it's kind of a dick thing to say when your dad isn't around," Larry said awkwardly, as if reading his mind, but Ben smiled, shaking his head.

"It's fine, Lar. I understand. Honestly... it's nice being here with your family. They're really sweet. And I'm not sure it would have felt like Christmas without you."

"I feel that way too," Larry said quietly, looking down at the porch and taking one last drag of his cigarette before tossing the butt into the flower pot that had been put out for that purpose. He chewed on his bottom lip as he looked up at Ben. "I'm sorry about last night."

 _I'm not,_ Ben wanted to say, heart aching. Instead he shook his head, forcing a smile. "Nothing to be sorry about. Look... don't worry about it for now, okay? Let's just enjoy dinner with your family."

Larry nodded, lips still pursed unhappily, but went inside.

They didn't end up starting Risk, but several rounds of cards was a good enough way to pass the time, especially when there was plenty of mulled wine to go around and nobody seemed to care that Alex was drinking it, too. 

By the time they sat down for Turkey, Ben was already past buzzed, which should have made it easier for him to ignore Larry's father. Except that in trying not to think about his own uncertainties, it was too easy for him to think about his own father, how much he would have loved for Dad to meet Larry, how warm and welcoming Dad surely would have been. Fortunately there was more wine with dinner, big one and a half liter bottles that were poured out among glasses and then quickly replaced with full ones when they ran out.

Larry's dad, in contrast, was... not actively offensive, but certainly just barely there, as if not acknowledging his son's presence meant that it wasn't real. It made Ben feel irrationally angry, and he was definitely drinking too much, but he didn't care. Despite his own insecurities when it came to his feelings about Larry, he crowded into him more, taking any excuse to touch him as they ate and talked, glaring down the table towards where his father sat. Thank god there was wine.

The fourth - fifth time? Ben had lost count - his father asked one of the uncles a question without so much as glancing down their end of the table, something inside Ben snapped. "You know, Larry's in the top five percent of the forensics program at Quantico, if you actually care."

"Is he!" Nan looked immediately delighted. "That's so nice, dear. That's - like that CSI TV show, isn't it?"

"Uh, kind of," Larry replied with a little half smile.

"It's very prestigious," Ben added, still staring at his father. "He's going to have his choice of placements. He's a badass."

"I'll toast to that," Aunt Poppy raised her wine glass immediately.

"And Mr. Bryne?" Ben couldn't stop himself from saying.

The man sighed, pursing his lips with displeasure, and raised the glass. "I hope they're still as complimentary when they find out you're a fag."

"Frederick, mind your language!" Nan said sharply, rapping his knuckles with her butter knife.

"They know I'm gay, Dad," Larry said, low and even.

"Which you would know if you talked to him," Ben added. His ears were burning with anger, and he took another gulp of wine like it would somehow quench the heat.

"Ben," Larry said softly, and shook his head in warning.

"And I suppose you're the reason why my son is flaunting this perversion instead of just keeping quiet about it like a respectable person?"

"Don't." Larry said sharply to Ben before he could open his mouth, then looked at his father. "I'm going out for a smoke, and because it's Christmas, when I come back I'm going to pretend you didn't say any of that." Then he pushed back from the table, and Ben hurried to follow him, catching up both their jackets on the way outside, off the back porch and into the yard.

"Where the hell does he get off talking like that?" Ben nearly exploded, handing Larry his jacket before stuffing his arms into his own. "Did he seriously just call you a fag? I've never wanted to punch a douchebag so much in my life! How the fuck can you stand it?" He knocked a cigarette out of his pack angrily, and was about to light it when he realized Larry hadn't moved, hugging his coat to his chest, head lowered. His shoulders shook visibly, and Ben gave a moan of dismay, moving to pull Larry into his arms.

For a moment Larry tensed, resisting, then sagged against him helplessly. "I can't," he choked. "I can't stand it. I hate seeing him, I hate knowing that - that no matter what I do - I - I'll always be a disappointment to him - "

"Fuck him," Ben choked, holding him tighter. "Fuck him for making you feel that way. He's the disappointment. You're so amazing, Lar, fuck him if he can't see that."

Larry said nothing, but held him tighter, trembling, and Ben shifted enough to take his coat from him, wrapping it around his shoulders and holding it in place with his embrace. "Shh," he murmured softly, stroking his back. "I'm so sorry, Lar. I didn't mean to andag - antagonize - didn't want him to be a dick to you. I just got so angry that he clearly didn't give a fuck...."

"Wasn't your fault," Larry choked, returning his embrace. "I just shouldn't have come. I shouldn't have dragged you out here, I shouldn't have put you through this - "

"Stop. Stop." Ben pulled back enough to take his face in his hands, kissing his forehead, pressing his own against it. "I wanted to be here, I wanted to be with you. I'll deal with a million assholes to be with you, Larry I'll do _anything_ for you. You know that, don't you? Please believe me. I need you to believe me."

Larry let out a long breath, fingers tightening on Ben's arms, digging into them even through his coat. "I know," he said softly. "I... don't know why, but I appreciate it, Ben."

"Because you're important to me. Because you - you're my family, Lar." Part of Ben's brain was telling him to stop, that he was saying too much, but he'd already given his tongue reign and he'd had too much wine to pull it back. "You're the most important. You're the best person. I want you to know that, you're so amazing and beautiful and I don't wanna spend Christmas - or anything - without you. Do you wanna leave? We can go if you want. Or I'll fight your dad if you want me to. I can totally take him. Just say the word."

Larry made a little noise that sounded like it might almost be a laugh, stepping back from him enough to wipe a hand across his face. "No. No, thank you, but no. I... I'll be okay." He cupped Ben's cheek with one hand and gave him a watery smile. "You're quite drunk, aren't you?"

And Ben's dumb mouth, of course, chose that moment to say, "I love you."

For a split second that felt like an eternity, Larry didn't move - didn't even blink. Then he gave a huffed laugh, patting his cheek gently. "God, you're _really_ drunk, Ben. You're quite possibly white-girl-wasted."

"No!" Ben argued. "Well yes, but no! I meant that! I'm drunk now and I'm always an idiot but I love you and I don't wanna be your fake boyfriend! Am I an idiot?"

Larry's eyes grew bright, and he drew a choked breath, stepping closer to him. "You're not an idiot," he managed, swallowing hard. "But you're gonna regret this when you're not drunk."

"No," Ben argued again, pouting, reaching up to cup his cheek. "No I'm not. I love you. I want to be your real boyfriend." It was overwhelming to say so much, and he could feel his former anger rapidly careening towards unlocking the helplessness and despair he'd felt since Larry had pulled away from him that morning. "Am I an idiot? You don't want a boyfriend. God, I'm an idiot, aren't I?" He was too hot, he was _way, way too hot_ and looking at Larry was really overwhelming, so Ben did what seemed easiest and sat down in the snow.

"Oh, Ben..." Larry gave a soft laugh, dropping to his knees in front of him, and then Ben was being kissed, sweet and warm and far more than friendly. He gave a soft groan, pulling Larry closer, and for a moment was lost to the blissful haze of his own desire, drinking in Larry's kisses and craving more.

"I love you," he said again desperately as Larry pulled from his mouth, and his friend smiled, pressing his fingers to Ben's lips.

"Let me go get you a glass of water, okay? I'm going to get you a glass of water, and we'll stay out here for a bit, and when you're feeling better we can finish dinner and talk afterwards. Okay?"

"I'm not drunk," Ben insisted, despite knowing that it wasn't exactly what he wanted to say. "I'm not too drunk to love you," he tried again, which was closer, and Larry gave a soft smile.

"Okay," he said gently, leaning in to press a kiss to his forehead. "Stay here for a minute, okay? I'll be back with some water."

"...kay." Ben watched him climb the steps to the porch and go inside - god, why was he having so much trouble focusing? A cigarette would help with that. Concentrating, he carefully picked himself up out of the snow, retrieving the rather squashed cigarette he'd stuffed back in the pack when he'd abandoned it to hug Larry. He lit it and took a long drag, trying to concentrate on the taste and sensation of inhaling instead of the way the world spun around him.

Then he leaned over and immediately lost his dinner directly into Larry's grandmother's raspberry bushes. 

He discovered they were raspberry bushes the hard way by grabbing one of the branches, thorns digging into his skin. Hissing in pain and shaking his hand, he dropped his cigarette somewhere in the mess, just to add insult to injury.

"... are you okay?" Larry asked behind him hesitantly.

Ben wiped his mouth on his sleeve. "... I'm really drunk. And the raspberries bit me. I barfed in the raspberries. I'm sorry. Tell your grandma I'm sorry."

Larry chuckled softly, taking his hand and giving a little sound of dismay at the red marks left behind by the raspberry branch. He pushed the plastic cup of water into Ben's other hand instead, then pressed his lips to the angry red marks on Ben's palm. "It's alright. I'm sure the raspberries will appreciate it. Just sip the water slowly, okay?"

Ben took the cup, rinsing his mouth out, then taking a sip. It was nice to be fussed over, he decided as he drank slowly, watching Larry nuzzle the angry thorn marks on his palm. He stroked his fingertips against his friend's cheek. "You aren't angry?"

"Never with you," Larry said softly, holding his gaze.

The look in his eyes made Ben feel like he was melting. "I wanna kiss you but I just barfed."

Larry gave a soft chuckle, then cuddled up against his side, kissing his temple. "We can go inside in a bit and you can brush your teeth. Then you can kiss me."

How was that the nicest thing he'd heard all day? Ben gave a pleased hum, wrapping his free hand around his waist and giving a squeeze. "... do you want a boyfriend?"

Larry's arm tightened around his shoulders. "You need to ask me that when you're sober, okay?"

Was Larry just saying that to be nice? But Larry said he was allowed to kiss him again. He needed to think about that, and stop worrying. At least, he hoped he could stop worrying.

"I feel a bit better now," he said finally, because as loathe as he was to stop cuddling Larry, his nose was cold and Larry's family was still inside. "We can go in. We can talk later."

"Okay," Larry said, lips brushing another kiss to his temple. Then he pulled away, leading him back inside.


	3. Chapter 3

By the time Ben had brushed his teeth and returned to the living-and-dining-room table, Larry had set tall glasses of water at both their plates and was buttering a dinner roll that he put on Ben's place with a little half smile. Ben took it gratefully, snagging another small bit of turkey as one of the platters made its way down the table, along with some roast yam and gravy. Surely all good choices to soak up the alcohol and settle his stomach.

Alex, who'd seated himself next to Ben, leaned close with a grin. "Nan gave Uncle Frederick a good telling off," he whispered delightedly, and Ben had to fight not to smile.

Two of the uncles had started clearing plates while their wives brought on pies and whipped cream and a large round fruited cake of some kind that... was that actually a Christmas pudding? In the midst of this, Larry's father stood up, kissing his mother on the cheek and making his goodbyes, finally pausing behind Larry's chair. "Larry... can we talk in the hall for a minute?"

Ben cast a worried glance to his friend - boyfriend? Best friend? - but Larry gave him a reassuring smile and a little shake of his head, following his father out of the room. Still worried, Ben tried to listen for Larry's familiar tones as he finished what was on his plate. He couldn't understand what they were saying, but Larry didn't sound upset, and finally he could make out Larry saying, "Just come light the pudding. Just stay for a bit of pudding."

If that was what Larry wanted, of course Ben would support it. He turned as they re-entered, offering a smile that he hoped was contrite. "Sorry for speaking out of turn earlier, Mr. Byrne."

Larry's father looked briefly surprised. He didn't say anything, but gave Ben a genuine smile, patting him on the shoulder briefly before turning to return to where he'd been sitting. And when Larry looked at him he was beaming, so it was more than enough for Ben.

"Have a little piece," Larry told him, as they watched his father drench the _actual real life Christmas pudding_ in brandy and set it on fire. "Nan's been aging it in the pantry since October!"

"Since September," Nan corrected proudly, and Ben took a small piece as it was passed around, drenching it in cream and caramel like Larry did and finding the dish, if a bit strange in the mouth-feel, still charming and overall delicious.

After dinner, with Larry's father gone home and the younger kids putting on some kind of animated movie, Ben prudently took it upon himself to fill the kitchen sink with soapy water, washing the dishes that were handed to him as various people filled the dishwasher and put things away. Larry soon joined him to dry, and soon it was just the two of them alone in the kitchen, working in companionable silence to the low hum of pleasant conversation, Christmas music and the occasional squeal of laughter.

"You feeling okay?" Larry asked, fingers resting briefly on his hand before taking the large mixing bowl from him.

Ben nodded, giving him a sheepish smile. "Well, my butt is still uncomfortably damp, but I feel much better than before I barfed in the raspberry bushes. Probably _because_ I barfed in the raspberry bushes." He looked up at Larry worriedly. "Things okay with your dad?"

Larry nodded vaguely. "Better. He... apologized, or at least what he considers an apology. It was more than I usually expect from him, so... I'll take it." He set the mixing bowl back in a cupboard and re-folded the tea towel in his hands, expression serious as he looked at Ben. "I... didn't expect you to... stick up for me, I guess? Or - be offended on my behalf?"

"I'm sorry," Ben told him, placing a wet hand over his. "I really didn't mean to cause strife between you, I was being dumb and not thinking."

Larry shook his head, twisting his hand to squeeze Ben's. "You didn't make him think those things, and chances are one of us would have set him off at some point. It just... surprised me, I guess, because I... I'm used to telling myself that it's okay that he doesn't care about what matters to me, I'm used to just... making excuses and being distant, so... was kinda nice to be reminded that it's not okay."

"It's not okay," Ben agreed, heart still aching at the thought of anyone thinking that about Larry, let alone Larry himself. "You're amazing. You're important and wonderful and - and absolutely my favorite, Lar. I meant all of that."

Larry let out a slow breath, looking down at their still-joined hands, and wet his lips. "... are you sure you meant _all_ of it, Ben?"

Was Larry trying to give him an out? Part of his brain told him to take it, that continuing on was going to ruin everything between them. But he was tired of listening to that part of his brain. He was tired of being scared. "Of course I did," he said softly. "You... you don't have to agree to anything if you don't want to. I know that like... the whole dating thing isn't really your style. I still want to be friends with you and spend time with you no matter what. But... yeah, I would like to be your boyfriend for real and I do love you, Lar."

Larry gave him a tentative, trembling smile, looking up at him through that thick fringe of ginger lashes. "Do you still want to kiss me?" he whispered, and that was all the encouragement Ben needed.

He shook off his hands and rubbed them on the top of his jeans quickly, then pulled Larry close, arching up to claim those sweet, lush lips with his own. Larry gave a soft, distinctly relieved sounding moan into his mouth, fingers tangling in his hair as he sagged against him.

"I'm sorry I pulled away this morning," he whispered against his lips. "I... I want this. I was scared. But I want this so bad, Ben, I want - I've wanted you forever, and I told myself it was stupid and you'd never be interested in me like that, but I... I couldn't help it...."

"Not stupid," Ben murmured, and kissed him again, tangling his fingers in the back of his shirt and wishing he didn't need to stop. It had always felt good kissing Larry, but the realization that it was finally more than just pretending or horsing around or making excuses on New Years Eve... it all felt better than Ben could have ever imagined. He let himself indulge again, kissing him longer, licking past those tantalizing lips to taste brandy and Christmas spices. "Will anyone notice if we disappear after dishes are done?"

Larry gave a huffed, breathless laugh, freckled cheeks actually flushing pink. "I mean, Alex'll grumble but we can make up for it tomorrow." He leaned closer to nuzzle along Ben's jaw, voice low and husky and hot against his ear. "You saying you want to fuck me in my dad's childhood bedroom, Ben?"

"Oh shit, yeah," Ben managed to reply, because he certainly didn't even have to think to answer that one - which was probably a good thing, since a good portion of his blood supply was quickly leaving his brain to rush south.

Larry pulled back, biting his bottom lip on a grin that was very promising, quirking his eyebrows, then picking up the dish towel again. "Better get scrubbing, then."

Ben gave an incredulous laugh, turning back to the sink. "... aye aye, sir."

It didn't take long, and Larry didn't make him wait; he'd barely pulled the plug after the last casserole dish and Larry was grabbing his hand and pulling him from the kitchen. He pulled Ben through the back corner of the living room to the stairs while mostly staying out of sight of the rest of the visitors - Ben winked in response to Alex's questioning look - and then they were upstairs, finally alone, and Ben could pull Larry back into his arms again.

"God, I want you," he murmured, stroking one still damp hand up into his hair and tangling tight as he sucked at that luscious bottom lip. "Anything you want, Lar, fuck...."

Larry groaned into his mouth, blindly fumbling the door shut behind them. His hands stroked hungrily over the back of Ben's shoulders, smoothing down to clench and squeeze at his ass, and if Ben had thought before that kissing Larry was good, kissing an _enthusiastic_ Larry was exquisite - god, how was he ever supposed to stop?

"I really wanted you to fuck me this morning," Larry admitted breathlessly, hands sliding up under his sweater and tshirt, caressing his bare skin. "I'm sorry I pulled away. I can blow you if that's too much, though, fuck, I loved having your cock in my mouth, I'll do anything, Ben - "

Everything he was saying was intensely arousing, almost too much to handle. Ben pressed him back against the wall, pulling Larry's shirt off over his head before doing his best to kiss him breathless, pinning him in place with his hips. Larry gave a little mewling moan into his mouth, fingers digging in to the top of Ben's ass as he rocked up against him. Ben could feel the hard ridge of his cock press against him through his jeans, and if Ben hadn't already been hard the proof of his friend's - his _boyfriend's_ \- arousal would have made him dizzyingly so.

"Was that really what you were thinking about this morning?" he murmured as he kissed along his jaw, slipping one hand between them to stroke down the warmth of Larry's chest and over his abs.

Larry gave a breathless, helpless laugh, tugging Ben's sweater and t-shirt up and over his head. "Fuck, how could I not? Felt like I'd been awake for hours thinking about it, wanting you to wake up and touch me, and then you did and I hardly knew what to do with myself..." His breath grew more laboured, sliding his palms down Ben's bare back to cup his ass again, pulling him closer. "Fuck, Ben, feeling that monster cock pressed hard against my ass...."

It was quickly becoming impossible to think about anything else. Ben pressed a hand between them to rub Larry's cock through his jeans. "Makes me so hot to feel how hard you are," he breathed. "Can we really have sex? I think I still have a condom in my wallet...."

Larry gave a muffled groan, kissing him hard before pulling back. "Wedge the desk chair under the doorknob just in case," he murmured, then pulled away from him.

Doing so only took a moment, though Ben forced himself to take the time to test it, pulling on the handle to make sure the wedge held tight. He turned to see Larry take a still half-wrapped bottle out of his duffle with a smirk, showing it to Ben. "Alex thought it was the most hilarious gift possible."

Ben stared at the bottle. "... Gun Oil?"

"It's actually pretty good stuff," Larry said, setting it on the bedside table, then perching on the side of the bed. "If you still want...."

It only took a moment to cross the space between them, bending to catch Larry's mouth, then crawling over his lap as Larry pulled him down with him. God, it felt good to be so close. He filled his arms with the warmth of Larry's bare torso, hands cupping the back of his shoulders, and couldn't help but drop his mouth to Larry's neck, kissing along the tendons, feeling Larry shiver, swallowing under his lips. "Wanna kiss every freckle on your body," Ben breathed, and Larry gave a breathless moan, fingers digging into his back.

"I really didn't think you were into guys," he murmured, and Ben forced himself to pull back and look at him.

"I..." he stopped because it had never been easy to explain or understand, even for himself. "I'm into you," he said, a little helplessly. "I'm into the way that you smile, how it feels to be around you, I - I want to make you happy. I want to be happy with you. I love you, and it's made me want you for so long, Lar... is that enough?"

Larry nodded, smile trembling, and kissed him. "Yeah."

Still, even though he'd much rather keep kissing him, Ben's worries forced him to continue. "You don't have to limit yourself to me. I know it's not your thing, the - the boyfriend thing - "

Larry cut him off with a hard kiss, a breathless laugh against his mouth. "Silly boy," he rasped. "How could I settle down with anyone when I was already in love with you? Fuck, Ben, I've _always_ been in love with you." Larry's hands moved from his thighs up over his hips before starting to pull his jeans undone, fondling his cock through them as he did. "Fuck, get these off for me, I need this cock in my mouth right now."

It was certainly easier to obey than to unpack everything Larry had just said, and Ben stood to kick off his jeans and boxers, reaching for Larry's jeans to help him do the same. He followed him down into bed, but couldn't resist the urge to claim his mouth again, twining their legs together. "I'm so in love with you."

Larry gave a choked groan against his lips. "Best Christmas present ever," he breathed, then slid down his body to take his cock in his mouth.

Ben couldn't help but watch him, especially since he'd been half drunk and distracted by orgasm the night before. "God, Lar - " he managed, biting his lip on a groan as Larry cast a glance up his body through his eyelashes, intent and unmistakably pleased. His lush lips, pink from their kisses, slowly caressed his head, smirking around him as he pulled back to suckle the tip, tongue working against him in ways that made Ben forget how to breathe. Then those lips were sliding down the length of his shaft with a groan, Larry's eyes falling closed as he swallowed, and - Jesus fuck, did people actually deep throat out of porn? "Fuck - " he gasped, fighting the urge to arch up into the pleasure of it, biting the side of his fist to keep quiet. "Fuck, Lar, I can't - Stop - "

Larry pulled back with a pleased hum, grinning, licking a stripe up the underside of his cock before sucking along his iliac furrow. "Too much, handsome?"

"You're so good," Ben gasped, a little overwhelmed. "I want to please you, too...." 

Larry licked over his abs, sucking briefly just above his belly button, his breath a huffed laugh against his skin. "Everything about you pleases me. Fuck, Ben, you're so hot I hardly know where to start...."

God, how long had it been since he'd been with someone that was so enthusiastically into his body? Or did everything feel sexier because he was so into Larry? "Can have all of it, love. Anything you want."

"Don't wanna rush you..." Larry licked his way over to one nipple, lavishing attention on it with a groan. At the same time he moved to straddle his hips, rocking against him slowly.

"You aren't." Ben had to resist the urge to rock up against the heat of his body, cupping his hips with his hands. "Lar...."

Larry licked up his neck, capturing his mouth with a soft groan. "Ever done anal, sexy?"

Fuck, just the thought of being inside him was overwhelming. "Not... successfully," he tried to warn.

Larry gave a low, pleased chuckle, sitting up. He grabbed the lube, stroking some down the length of both their cocks as he slowly rocked against him. "Amy couldn't handle this monster cock?"

God, how had he ever resisted that smirk? Ben tried to pull his thoughts together enough to answer. "You - you sure you can?"

Larry chuckled again, pouring more lube on his fingers and reaching back, eyes falling closed on a soft groan. Fingering himself, Ben realized with a pulse of arousal, biting his lip on a groan as Larry's eyes fluttered open again to look at him, dark with promise. Then he leaned over the bed to grab Ben's jeans, tossing them to him. "Grab that condom and I'll show you."

It still seemed somehow surreal that he was here, with Larry naked over top of him, slowly sinking down onto his cock with a sigh of pleasure. It couldn't be real, and yet every part of it was so vividly so - the joy he felt from Larry's smile, the sensation of being able to touch him, stroking hands up those strong, freckled thighs, stroking his hips, rubbing over his firm, muscled ass. The pleasure of feeling Larry rock onto him, stretching around him, his thighs trembling slightly as he moved. The radiantly glorious little cry of pleasure that escaped Larry's lips as he bottomed out inside him.

"Shhh," Ben breathed, rubbing his hips, despite very much wanting to echo him. "Shh, love... gonna traumatize your family...."

Larry gave a shaky laugh, curling over him, pressing a breathless, yearning kiss to his mouth as he rocked on him. "God, Ben..." 

Ben couldn't help but pull him closer, stealing a whimper from his lips with another kiss. He wrapped his arms around as much of Larry as he could touch, stroking fingers through that thick auburn hair, down his back. "You okay?"

"Oh yeah." Larry's eyes fell closed briefly as he began to move a little harder, choking back a moan. "Oh fuck, so big - so fucking good - !"

Ben couldn't help but move with him, arching up into the exquisite heat of his body, stealing Larry's helpless moan with a kiss. It felt impossible to be quiet when the pleasure of their joining was so good, the rock of Larry's hips growing more urgent as Ben arched up to meet him. "Shh," he breathed again, because focusing on the whisper felt like the only way to keep crying out. "Save it for home," he murmured, and the thought of it was amazing - taking Larry home as his boyfriend, living with his boyfriend, being able to hold and kiss and touch him and be close whenever they wanted. "Save it for tomorrow - make as much noise as you want at home, love - "

Larry choked back a cry, kissing him, hard and trembling. "I love you so fucking much, Ben Carson," he gasped. All too soon they were reaching the peak together; Larry, choking back a cry against his lips as he spilled between them, so tight around him, the triumph of it pulling Ben over the edge. The pleasure of climax was amazing, but more than that, - there was a deep satisfaction, a kind of pride that was perhaps misplaced when Larry had done most of the work. And yet Larry was _his_ , and as soon as Ben could breathe again he was kissing every part of him that he could reach - his jaw, cheek, lips, nose. "My love," he murmured, hearing his voice come thick. "My love."

Larry pressed close, breathless, burying his face in his neck. "This is real, isn't it. You and I."

"I promise," Ben murmured, holding him closer. "I love you. Wanna be your real boyfriend for as long as you let me."

Larry gave a choked laugh, eyes bright when he pulled back to press a trembling kiss to his mouth. "Best Christmas Ever," he whispered.

"Best Christmas so far," Ben corrected, and Larry laughed, kissing him again.

"Perfect.

~~~The End~~~


End file.
